Seriously, I don't even know where to begin. Emma is SO dramatic, in E.V.E.R.Y. way! Sometimes I find myself rubbing my eyes, trying to get a different picture, a different point of view, maybe her point of view, but I still feel blind. Emma is smart. She is 1 of 2 kids in her class that can count to 20 (but she counts higher than that) and can write the whole alphabet. She is starting to read, but she says she can read when she wants to make up the story. She really tries hard to be a good big sister, but really, she is just plain bossy to her siblings. At least I know she loves them.I have struggled in the recent few months at how to touch her heart. She is such a STRONG willed little spirit. I know that there is no gray line in her life. It is either black or white and nothing between the two. It scares me a lot that if I mess up now, she'll be wearing prison strips in 15 years. I hate that picture, but I have seen it in my mind before. Emma is cleaver. She knows right from wrong. Thinking about right from wrong when presented with an idea, now, that is a VERY different story. For instance, this last week, she has had a cough, and was complaining of a slight sore throat. We used the kids chloraseptic spray with her before bed one night and during the night the next. We left it on our tall dresser, and lo and behold, she gets it the next day. Not only does she get it, but she sprays it all over the side of Paige's head, on Mason, and in the tissue box next to my bed. She also claimed that she sprayed it on our comforter. Our room wreeked! I opened the window to air out the room, and it was 35 degrees out. So then the house was cold. When we asked why she did it, simply came the "Cause I wanted to spray something". I asked "Was that a good choice, or a bad choice?" Came the reply "Bad". So why did you do it??? I just don't get it. I try hard to give opportunities to do fun things, not as often as I want, but I try. I want to invite friends over, but every time I do, the naughtiness starts and it is really bad. Do others have the same trouble? The babysitter loves her, and thinks they are all so cute and fun, and I agree. I think that my kids become different little people when I step out. I am sure all kids do that. Can I pretend to be the babysitter and get some good behavior and good choices and happy moods on my shift? I want to have fun with Emma, I want to enjoy her at this age cause really, she's never going to be this little again, even though, really, she isn't that little anymore. I want the little troublemaker in her to go away so I can enjoy the day with her, instead of feeling like the mommy who is always "getting her into trouble". I am sure that some of this will pass, but I am scared that this is her personality and this is all I will ever see coming from my beautiful daughter that is so much like me, yet so different. Where do I go from here? I'm not sure, but I'll let you know where I get there.
6 comments:
You are describing Claire to a T. And I have no answers but to love her and give her one on one attention. Cora was rarely that way. She was not disobedient (the exact opposite actually), did not destroy things and always wanted to please and do the right thing. Claire? Not so much. She is just awful. And I struggle with her. Because of Cora's demeanor, I am finding it so difficult to have patience with Claire. Lately, she has started lying. Flat out lying. Even when I know with 100% certainty that she is lying, I look her in the eye and explain why telling the truth is so important, she will look me right back in the eye and lie to my face. Ugh! If you do figure it out, please share. Pretty please?
hhhmmmmm that reminds me of someone. Oh yes, that would be Alex. He is so bossy, Always into things, and will not stop jumping from piece of furniture to another. One time I had to call poison control because he decided to give Jayden a shower of 409. It scares me too that I have to fix his behavior now, How will he behave with teacher. And you know what they say they develop their personalities between the age of 3-6. Oh dear. On the other hand he is so loving and so smart. One thing that might get you some perspective is to go read a child development chart. Most of their behavior is textbook for 4-5 year old. It's a stage. They will grow out of it or should I say from it. I think the most important thing is to continually teach them how they should behave. I think the biggest mistake parents make is to ignore the behavior because it is just a phase. Try to enjoy them. And one more thing, (I learned this while training Ginny, of all things.) Praise them often when you see good behavior. Not for their sake, no, for yours. With "Good Ginny" "yes Ginny" coming out of my mouth all day long I realized she did more good things than bad. Weird but it helps. Also I have learned that if I wear both the kids and the dog out, they are better behaved, and sleep better. :). In short your daughter is normal.
No advice- I'm certain you will do the right thing by your little girl. You are the one who knows her best. And you are also the one entitled to inspiration from the One who REALLY knows her best.
Well, I do have one comment. I noticed that while we are at my parents' house Grace directed all her bossiness at the dogs. Having doggies around was the best thing for Grace and Grant's relationship. Of course, that would necessitate getting a dog. Which is tantamount to getting a new child...
She sounds normal to me. My girls get into trouble too, I think its just part of being a kid. Good luck!
Yep, sounds normal to me too. Nikki used to be very bossy with Garrett but I think she's toned down a little bit. Just keep trying to point her in the right direction. And also remember to watch how you are behaving because they will do and say the same things you do. I've learned that the hard way and am now trying to watch myself and correct my kids at the same time. It's better if we can be a good example from the start. That's one thing I need to work on for sure.
Heather oh do I know how you feel. Let me see I have 2 kids like this. And who knows how Elora will be b/c she is still a baby. Everyday I struggle to know how to deal with Ashley and she is 8 now so this is prime time for one road or the other. I just keep telling myself teach her to chose good friends and then maybe I will have a shot at her making good choices through the teen years. But she is constantly in trouble at home and there have been a few times even at school this year. Sometimes I feel like why do I even bother trying to be their mother when it doesn't seem like they are listening or doing what I am asking/teaching them. But then we'll have moments of fun, love, and peace where it makes it worth it. I tend to have to look back at her scrapbooks to really remember those times. But they have been there. Then there is the Wyatt not sure how to handle him. Tanis was so different. In 1 week Wyatt broke, the Nintendo DS, the DVD player, and we thought my camera but it seems to be find. My sister calls him cujo and I think she is not far off in that assessment. I really don't know how to handle this all boy rough and tough stuff. But I love him and you love Emma so if we mom's just all lean on each other we will make it through. Miss you
Post a Comment